What Will I do without COLD gatorade? Do they make CAT floatation devices? I only know to go to the basement but that's for tornados. AHHH I am not prepared for a Hurricane. Someone give me a safety kit!

So I hate to buy into the chaos of this hurricane that's coming our way on the east coast but I seriously cannot help it. I am glued to the news, I could be the newest meteorologist outlining the path of the storm and where it will hit (as of today).

I have never been in a hurricane!! BUT I have been in a tornado. In first grade. Where I ducked under my desk until it passed.... and the roof of our school got torn off. And my mom had to come get me. But we've all seen the movie Twister. Tornadoes come and then they go. They tear threw and they bring a cyclone of wind. You hide in the basement (or if you want to go back to the movie Twister, you can strap yourself onto some water pipes that are secured into the ground). But they PASS. Hurricanes? All damn day....

J and I could do this if it was a tornado coming. But it's not. It's a hurricane. Like Katrina that hit Louisiana and tore its life apart. I don't like it. I don't mean to panic, but I have SO many questions.

In a tornado, you flee to the basement. In a hurricane? I mean yes to stay away from the wind. But what if it floods? Then what? J and I could survive in a little water... But what about my cats? I have the cat carriers out (yeah I'm a crazy pet parents- shhhh don't judge) and ready to go. Go where? Who the heck knows. I envision myself moving throughout our house on Sunday as needed. Up high if it's flooding,  down low if it's windy.This may be what my animals look like.

Umm and food? I guess I should join the club of gathering in the grocery store and/or Targetr. That will happen tomorrow afternoon on my way home. I think if I get 2 jars of peanut butter, some type of bread, and gatorade (I hate warm gatorade, but it will due) we will be good to go. Oh and potato chips. That would be good.

UGH I hate bad weather. Not only is this thing going to torment us, it is going to head up to Boston and torment my brother and sister-in-law, who live on the coast. Like the actual beach. And so far they are not evacuated. But how about you guys evacuate yourselves?

In conclusion, I will buy gatorade, hide in my basement/living room/garage, put my cats in their carriers and/or in inappropriate floatation devices, buy a lot of peanut butter, and forbid my husband to leave the house because everyone knows I'd lose my shit (sorry mom) if I was alone when this thing hit....

Dear Irene, I don't like your name and I don't like your path either. Find someone else to bully.

xo,

Hurricane Emergency Preparer.